There are many "reasons" people cite for the demise of their marriage. There are also some good research available that tells us what really causes divorce. With the always embarrassing divorce rates high, it is important to take a look at what types of information that people believe that can not really be true about what distinguishes divorce in motion.
Here are three common myths about the causes of divorce:
business are the cause of most divorces
Believing infidelity causes a wedding at the end is probably the most common belief distorts what precipitated the divorce. infidelity complaints are what a couple calling the therapy office in many cases, but it is imperative to examine the underlying problems that led to the deal. The most common reasons given by people divorcing the causes are, "more and more gradually outside," "do not feel close" or "feel unloved or appreciated." Another problem cited is serious conflict or fighting.
Arguments and conflicts in the relationship leads to the conclusion that people look "outside marriage" to find what they are missing in the marriage. It seems to be rarely strictly about sex itself. It seems easier there, slowly and gradually cascade divorce. the loneliness and disconnection make people vulnerable to relations outside marriage.
Only women are capable of monogamy
There's a lot of information online and in books, even adopted by the researchers, who have a little damage in respect to monogamy. There is no real scientific proof that men do not value monogamy or they must Philander or "spread their seed." There seems to be a cultural push for women to simply accept this erroneous information as if male biology. There are much more solid research out there that shows that men enjoy being married perhaps even more than women. Sometimes the marriage is the only close relationship and strong support they have.
Gender differences pose divorce
How gender explain that every heterosexual couple resigning or staying married has male and female counterparts? It makes no sense that gender has a significant effect in itself. There is always an interaction between man and woman is divorcing. So sex could interact with something else, such as conflict or disconnection.
Miscommunication Causes Divorce
people in difficulty can communicate very clearly how they feel and mean. There is no way to teach people to never disagree or argue that all couples disagree and argue at some point. What is most striking to focus on how they handle the emotions and what they then do to compensate. Men and women can participate in negative processes in the argument. For example, by refusing to speak or start a conversation with severe and critical. It is common to be taught communication skills from a book or therapy sessions, but still have it all go to pot during an argument. For example, using "active listening" and "I statements" can be forgotten in the emotional turmoil of the conflict.
Believing any of these myths is destructive to the institution of marriage. These myths can lead couples in the wrong way, or worse, to convince them that their relationship is hopeless. Of conflicting information from unreliable sources adds to the problem. It is often hoping to fix the marriage, and soon the couple discusses their problems, the better the result.
Source : Gottman, J. (1999). Marriage Clinic: A scientifically based marital therapy . New York, NY: WW Norton & Company, Inc.
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